When it comes to good sex, who better to ask than the people who do it professionally? Yep, that’s right – we’re talking real, practical, pleasure-first tips from sex workers who know what actually works.
We spoke to a few working escorts and erotic performers to find out what they wish more people knew in the bedroom. Here’s what they had to say.
- Your Mouth Is a Tool — Use It Properly
“I’ve had guys go down on me like they’re trying to sandpaper the clit off. Chill. Use your tongue like it’s a tongue, not a squeegee,” says 22-year-old Carla, one of the popular Liverpool escorts working at Olivia James. “When it comes to oral, one technique never works for everyone. Switch it up a bit.”
“Use the flat of your tongue to drag slowly across the clit or shaft,” she shares. “Flick the tip of your tongue in gentle circles for teasing. Alternate between licking and sucking gently — not like a Hoover, more like a long, wet kiss.”
Oh — and don’t forget to use your hands at the same time. Touch the thighs, squeeze the hips, play with nipples or balls. You’ve got a whole body. Use it.
- Never Dismiss Foreplay
Most people skip straight to penetration, like the whole thing is a race. But why? Why on earth would you want to rush something so erotic? Surely, you’d want to take your time with it?
“Foreplay is a big, big part of sex. Perhaps the most important. If you think it’s just what you do before the real stuff starts, you’re probably bad at both.” – Lottie, 29, London escort.
Some favourite moves from the pros:
- Suck their fingers: Start with one in your mouth, slow and wet. It’s suggestive and kinky as hell.
- Ear play: Whisper filth. Bite the lobe. Breathe. Don’t underestimate how much ears are wired into the nervous system.
- Hand between the thighs: Don’t dive in. Let your hand hover. Light grazing. It’s the tease that does the damage.
“If someone’s squirming before I’ve even touched their genitals, I know I’ve got them. That’s what good foreplay does.” – Nico, 31, GFE escort.
- Don’t Be Afraid to Use Toys
“I once had a guy say using toys was only for women. I prove him wrong and made him come with a vibrating butt plug in two minutes. He changed his mind on the use of toys very fast after that.” – Sami, 34, sex worker.
Here’s what the pros recommend:
- Vibrating cock rings: Feels good for both of you and helps keep him hard.
- Suction toys: The holy grail for clits. Use them during oral or while fingering.
- Mini vibrators: Great to hold in your mouth or use on their nipples while you go down on them.
“Start with lube and one toy. Don’t go full drawer-of-doom on the first go,” Sami adds. “But don’t act weird about it either. It’s fun. It’s supposed to be.”
- Temperature Play is Easy, Cheap & Fun
No need for a dungeon or £100 kit. Some of the filthiest sessions use just one ice cube.
“Take a sip of cold water before kissing down their stomach. They’ll feel that contrast, and it drives people wild.” – Carla, again, clearly the MVP.
Other tricks:
- Rub an ice cube over nipples or thighs.
- Blow warm air across the skin after licking it.
- Use hot wax play with a candle — just test it on your wrist first.
- Check In With Him or Her
Asking for feedback during sex doesn’t have to kill the mood — in fact, it can make it.
“One guy leaned in while he was fingering me and just said, ‘Tell me what you want me to do next.’ Because of that one simple question, I ended up having the best orgasm of my life.” – Mira, 28, independent escort in Manchester
The trick isn’t to overthink it. Just keep it low voice, close range, simple words. Think of it like dirty talk with a purpose.
Try something like, “Do you want it slower?” or “Is that the spot, or should I move a bit?”. Asking questions shows you’re paying attention without stopping everything to hold a conference.
“I had a client who’d just say, ‘Right there?’ while he was licking me — and I’d moan so hard he didn’t need a yes or no.” – Lana, 26, works with couples and women.
Even if you’re confident, don’t assume. Bodies change, preferences change, and what worked for one person won’t always work for the next. If you’re already in a sexy rhythm, checking in doesn’t interrupt it — it enhances it. It tells your partner, I’m here with you, not just going through a routine.
Do Less, But Mean It More
The one thing every sex worker we spoke to said? Slow the hell down.
It’s not about showing off. It’s not about getting from A to B. The best sex — whether you’re paying for it, filming it, or doing it for love — is about being present. Watching how they react. Listening to their breath. Asking what they want. Giving it.
“The best lovers aren’t the ones with the biggest dick or best technique. They’re the ones who actually care if you’re enjoying it.” – Jessie.
So take this as your cheat sheet. If sex workers — who’ve seen it all — say these are the things that work, you better believe they’re worth trying.
